Its one of those days...

...those days when I feel overwhelmed by everything. But at the same time so ashamed that I feel like this, after so long, so much education, so much knowledge and I still end up at the bottom.

I have cried in frustration, pain and exhaustion (can I blame hormones you think? periods suck...). Where is that magic wand when you need it?

I'm going through withdrawal coming off tramadol, despite coming off it the way I got told but I managed to survive the 6 hour bus trip without succumbing and being tempted to take some. Its funny but at least this is just because of physical dependence (quite different from addiction) and my body has to adjust in its own time. I'm not sleeping, I feel crappy and teary and had the 'jitterbugs' lol. Pain has increased and not only in my crps areas but also in my wrist, abdomen and also my 'fixed' hip (and its just like pre surgery pain). I think this revelation has me slightly gutted because I thought after 2.5 years things were finished with it for now. I know that I still have impingement that wasn't able to be removed and the beginnings of OA and I have been pushing it lately but still. Why did it have to join in now? lol and I still have the gabapentin to decrease yet too, what will that bring?

I asked the dr what are we going to do if coming off the meds doesnt change anything as far as the nausea/puking is concerned (bad on my part because that is just negative thinking), he said we will decide if/when that happens. I just feel like all this is bad timing, why now when I have 6 weeks left and then big exams?

I'm doing ok really, just being human and wishing things happened instantly rather than you having to have patience and wait and hope. If I learn nothing else through this I have to learn patience with myself or I will not get through. Things will get better and for what ever reason I am supposed to be walking this road just now and what I have to focus on is doing my best and showing I will do my part in the getting better thing-not at all easy when it involves things that make you feel worse in the short term but I am persevering.

My Aunt always says that you are never given more to cope with than you can handle, you just have to realise that plans are meant to be broken and not to have unrealistic expectations.

So, today is my 'write-off' day and tommorrow I will start the day with a smile (and breakfast) and hope it goes better than today.

Home on 'break'...

I got asked the other day if I was home on break or home because of the break lol! Technically I'm home on break but if it hadn't conveniently been a scheduled uni break I may have had to take time off anyway.
The OT has been persistent in reminding that the shaken brain deserves time to heal and that not giving it what it needs now may come back and bite me in the back so to speak.
Also with all the things going on with me recently I was told (rather bluntly) that if I dont take care of myself just now I am going to crash and be back here next year redoing the whole year again. And as my disability support lady said to me I've been through a lot in the last 2 years that to crash and fu*k up in the last 6 weeks of this year is not something she is going to let happen. Ummm so I think I heard that message loud and clear lol.

Wrist is confirmed as a definite fracture, and a total of 6 weeks casted is required-not a happy thought and currently driving me insane. I got a bright pink one cos its girly and I can scare people :) so far though, most people like it!

I cant write, cant cut things with a knife, cant wash, rinse properly or put my hair up. Its just completely awkward, dont get me wrong I'm not complaining but its certainly creating a lot of situations where I have to work out a way to get around the immobilised wrist. Also means I cant ride my scooter to uni so now I have to get up earlier in order to catch a bus into town and am at the mercy of their timetables. Last week I waited over an hour (in the dark sitting on the pavement) for a bus to get me home and still have to walk a couple of blocks before I am truly home. Its just so much more exhausting and I am going to have to do this for at least a month if not more. It also costs a lot more than petrol too, $25/week rather than $5-6/week.

The mirror is coming out daily, its the only thing that helps with the uncomfortable pain that has come with the new cast. At times all I want to do is rip it off!But for now I'm enjoying my week off, catching up on sleep, getting over a bad cold, relaxing, seeing friends and just being lazy...as well as working on my eating plan.

"CRPS won this week"

That is a quote from a text Jo sent me yesterday...CRPS has certainly had the upper hand this week, but have we given up? I think not!

Poor Jo had a nasty fall on Tuesday afternoon and I am still worried about whether she did some serious damage to her back when she fell on the concrete but I am hoping that it will settle down soon as long as she takes it easy. She didn't have a nice time in ED which is worrying when they do not take someone in pain seriously. Please say a few prayers that she will bounce back to feeling better really soon. I feel bad cos I would like to be able to help her out and make things easier for her but I cant.

Another of our friends (who also has crps) is having a rough time at work and it is not helping the situation. I think by Friday it became too much to handle so a few prayers for her would also be much appreciated. That her work situation settles down soon and that things are made easier to handle for her. Its bad enough the stress of working full time without people having personal vendettas against you.

And as for me, I followed in Jo's footsteps.
I had a fight with a judder bar (speed bump or whatever you call them) on a down hill driveway. It won...
Apparently I looked like I was doing a stunt double or something. I was walking down the driveway to the entrance of the rest home where I was on clinical placement and lost sense of my leg and tripped over the judder bar and fell down the bank thing. Lost consciousness for a minute or so. Apparently I was not keen to go to hospital but the RN who was checking me over decided it was necessary. I spent more than the minimum observation time because I was still pretty out of it 4 hours later so I was told. My dr and nurse were absolutely lovely though, it makes being in hospital so much nicer when you are treated well. I have holes in my very expensive clinical trousers, plenty of bruises and a few scrapes, concussion and apparently fractured the distal styloid process of the radius on my dominant hand.
Now the dr did say that she thought she could see 2 cracks in it so I'm hoping that when I go to my fracture clinic appointment that they will say it was all a mistake and not fractured afterall-I can always hope right?

I got rung up by the Occupational Therapist yesterday, she is concerned because I have concussion symptoms and am not taking time off. I dont have time to just now because I have a presentation to do on Monday etc, but I am going to have to monitor how I'm feeling and might just have to do as I'm told. She made some good points that if I push through things now and dont let my brain heal that I will make things worse and wont be able to do anything and be out of action longer. I am taking it a bit easy this weekend hoping that will be enough...

An exercise in human observation...

Which involved dressing up first...

Now we are ready for the proper photos...
At the ball...Discussing the interesting display of human behaviour...

What we were thinking of doing part way through the night (Jo regretted her heels) and couldnt get in the door fast enough when we got home lol!

Feet up on the couch...ahh that feels so much better (and then we had trouble getting up again and putting ourselves to bed)

It was fun dressing up and making the effort to go to the ball, but I felt much happier knowing I had Jo to stand beside. We had an interesting evening watching people drink themselves stupid, being kicked out by security for dangerous behaviour.
Frankly drunk people scare me! They are people I know, work with, are friends with but when they are drunk they are positively scary. In your face, hyper and they dont even remember anything afterwards. Why would you pay so much and then drink yourself to the point of nothing.

I was embarrassed actually, this was a large group of future health professionals acting very unprofessionally but that is the student culture at my university. Something I am not a part of.

But apart from that, we danced a little and chatted to people who weren't drinking into oblivion and enjoyed ourselves (I think-did we Jo?) but it was nice to go home afterward and chat in the quiet of Jo's house.
We both suffered the effects the next day (and the next and still...) Jo really overdid it having spent the day of the ball motobiking in a boggy field or two! But to dress up and be girly it was worth it.

Bowling can really shake a girl up

I went out last night, with a few close friends to go bowling.

Before we started I was shaking so bad I thought my knees would buckle-and this was socialising with close friends! It did get better though and I had lots of fun, we all did as they are highly competitive in a fun way. The highlight of the night was watching the Mum of the evening, jump in the air when she got a strike and subsequently the reaction when she came up beating us all!

I am no good at bowling (I think that was part of my anxiety in the beginning) but mixed in with many gutterballs I did manage a score of 9 once and a few respectable bowls.

It was really nice being part of the group, despite slipping a couple of times due to the slippery shoes and floor but I can handle a few bruises.
What made me feel bad though was how sick I felt when we went to their house for 'coffee' afterwards, I felt so ill and this really makes me conscious that I'm must be a downer, instead of looking like I'm enjoying myself I'm sat in a corner on the floor (because if I do fall I cant fall far) hoping that I dont puke. I wish I would feel better. I have been trying so hard to eat but everytime I eat a little bit more I feel so bad I wonder why I even bothered.
But this is a problem...I tried on my dress for the upcoming ball and discover that what fitted perfectly in February now hangs off me so much that we cant tuck it at all to make it passable. I do have something else that I can wear instead but thats not the point. The point is I now think I understand what everyone is going on about. I am trying-I promise...its just harder than you think and with that comes guilt about whats going on and my lack of understanding as to why and why me?
I went to the dr and he explained that they were having trouble deciding what would be best for me since I am so 'complex' (how I hate that word sometimes), and I dont fit into their little boxes but we have a semi plan, fingers crossed it doesnt fall through like the last 2 plans he had lol.
If only I could control the nausea then this wouldnt be so hard.

When it all feels too hard...

...its time to step up to the challange.

Things have been really weird lately, in many directions. I just want to start over and try harder but you cant do that in real life. I'm making bad choices and they are having a ripple effect and then all I do is make more bad choices.

I cant be bothered and am lazy apparently, and that really hurt to hear. I dont go out and socialise because I feel so out of place and uncomfortable (and because I'm so tired and in pain by the end of the day)-not because I cant be bothered!
So because this was said to me, I am now proving the statement wrong; I went for 2 walks on the beach this week, to ballet, and to aquafitness class (which includes a walk up and down a hill to the pool) as well as all my scheduled classes and then extra group meet ups. I am not lazy, I'm just scared of socialising and feel really self conscious when I dont have something specific to be doing.

I went to a party the other week, the girl who's birthday it was is really nice and I knew that I wouldn't feel pressured into anything. I almost didnt go at the last minute cos I felt really ill but I'm glad I went-I really enjoyed myself (and may have met a really nice boy so watch this space).

I find it really hard to put myself in positions where I'm not in control of the situation, socialising is not something you can control. I dont know what to talk about, I hate standing up and I dont drink (which is a big part of the student culture here). I dont know how to relax and just want to hide. I think its cos I feel so different and I dont get included in things that much, I feel like people are just putting up with me and I dont like forcing myself on them. I worry too much about other people and what they are thinking. I need a security blanket of some kind or someone to hide behind, I wish I was more outgoing.

But yesterday the girl who's party it was told me I had to go to more, that they were so surprised that I went and really happy I did make the effort. She posted some photos with me in on facebook and I am learning that people really do actually like me. So now I just have to try and loose my inhibitions a bit and make more effort because I resent being told I am just lazy.

There is more stuff going on, uni this semester is even more full on if that is possible and I dont think I have a great handle on exactly what is going on. I'm keeping up with classes but very behind in study, once I get my head around the timetable better I think I will settle into a better routine. But I've already started telling myself I havent done enough and need to really do way more work...I hate being type A

And I'm having a battle with eating...loosing weight I really shouldnt be, and dont seem to be able to snap out of whatever mindset I'm in that is saying its ok cos I'm feeling better this way. I getting through the day better this way why would I want to change? I know why, I'm just chosing not to

Bad choices, my life is full of them right now.

On the outside I'm fine, ever capable, reliable, smiling even (just a little thin)...

On the inside, I dont really know...

My bonny wee lad

Here are a few pics of my Godson Matthew, he entered the world abruptly while they were on the way to hospital in the middle of the night. Thankfully both Mother and baby were fine. Just before my exams started he was baptised and I am a very proud doting Godmother (now I have two kiddies to spoil). His Dad was in an accident the day after his baptism so things have been a bit tough in their house for a bit but it sounds like daddy is recovering well so fingers crossed he won't have much in the way of lasting impairment.I made his mother promise to take pics of him while I was away on break for 3 weeks because I was going to miss him growing (hopefully will get them from her soon) and he has grown a lot!

They came round the other afternoon when I was home from uni so I got lots of smiles and cuddles until he was fussing to be fed and Mother was required again :)I love babies, and he is a cutie. I cant believe that he is 10 weeks already!

Sydney trip...

Ok, so a little summary of my trip away. The plane ride over was ok, but I felt it more in the morning as I had to get my bags down 2 flights of stairs, silly me declined the offer of help from a young man. The 8 hour train ride to Armidale was ok too as I didnt have anyone sitting beside me so I was able to rest my legs up for most of the trip.
The first few days I spent in Armidale where my friend is studying, it was the 'restful' part of the trip, we did venture out and went on a heritage tour as well as a shopping trip and she gave me a guided tour of the university. But there was plenty of time for resting up, so much that I even read a whole book (something I haven't done for I dont know how long). She was in charge of all meals so I really didnt have to do much at all!

Then we took the train (another 8 hours and this time no chance of putting my feet up) back to Sydney to spend the rest of my holiday to get a taste of what Sydney has to offer. We were lucky enough to be able to stay in her friends appartment which was really nice.

We did rather a lot in the 4 days we had, maybe a little too much for me but I didnt want to waste the time so I braved it out. We did mammoth amounts of walking and there were a few moments where I just had to sit down and we had to find somewhere with seats. There was no chance of sitting on the pavement because there were just so many people walking everywhere. Each night as we headed back to the appartment for tea I was on my last legs so dinner was always simple and we got in our jamas and watched movies before going to sleep.
The weather was lovely most of the time, much warmer than it had been at home and a couple of days it was even just t-shirt weather.
I did have a lot of fun and we are already plotting places to go and visit (and shops too) which we didnt have time for but have decided we need to be earning and have plenty of money to spend lo (but even without much money this time I managed a fair bit of shopping)l!

Once I got home (thank you Mum for picking me up at the airport in the middle of the night), it took me a bit to get over the over activity of the week away but we pay the price of having fun and it was worth it. Waiting for the heritage tour to start in Armidale

With the Sydney harbour bridge in the background, it was warm enough for short sleeves

One of my much needed sit down breaks and refueling (I had a strawberry blended ice which was yummy!)

Another sunny day having fun on the way to Darling Harbour

Indulging, we had our nails done one morning

Its an update...

Holiday adventures should be the first post but I haven't got them all written up so instead I've got some dr appointment news to share.
I've been issued with a few things I MUST do (uh things I kinda knew I should be doing but have been a little slack with)
1-Try and take at least one salmon oil capsule a day despite how sick I feel (had been taking 4)
2-Make sure I take magnesium every day (should help the crappy distorting cramp things)
3-use the lignocaine cream twice a day (not the every now and then I have been doing to save it)
4-NO more falls

I got offered another peripheral nerve injection but it didnt do much good last time and I dont know what my hesitation is but I just dont feel 100% so I said no, I even said to them I didnt know why except that it didnt help much last time and they were fine with it but I still felt like I didnt have a good enough reason to say no.

I saw my physio this morning and its always good to see her because we get an hour to really discus things.
One of the first things she asked me was how much weight had I lost! I dont even know as I haven't weighed myself but its not that much I'm sure.
I had another random, extreme, double over in waves of pain, sweat bucket loads and feel like I'm going to pass out episodes a couple of days ago. Dr once again goes through the process of suspecting appendicitis (which I said it wasnt going to be), it was different from last time and several theories were suggested, bloods were done (which showed an elevated white count but later attributed to a cold I had over a week ago) but for now I'm to just monitor how things go.
Physio is pretty sure its all crps related, preceded by bad eating habits and stress. Apparently my stomach and GI tract are reacting to normal stimuli (ie food) and stretch and is so sensitive because I've basically been starving myself (not intenionally) so now I just feel very ill and nauseated all the time. So instead of the usual physio catch up session I had a nutrition lesson. A meal planner has been drawn up and step by step how to build up to eating 6 meals a day and what should be included in each one. I am not looking forward to all the work planning lists of choices but if this is what I have to do to start feeling better then I'm going to try my best. I am going to have to really plan this well so that I know what to buy at the supermarket each week or its not going to work and I need this to work.

We really didnt touch on how things have been going crps wise in other directions because she said the most important thing right now is to get me back on track or else nothing is going to change regardless of what we do. She did make me feel a bit better by saying that I'm doing really well and that because I'm in such a physically demanding course that its helping keep me going. Despite the times like I told her when I really don't want to eve stand up, I do because I have to...I realise even though I felt like I had lost my motivation-if I had, I wouldn't have carried on so I know I'm going back to physio school on Monday and I know I can do this. She also said not to let people make me feel like I have to prove anything, I can do this just as well as anybody and passing all my exams from last semester (apart from the one I have yet to sit) shows that. Another thing for me to keep in mind.

So for now I'm just going to focus on the things I can change, like my eating habits (or lack of) and following the pain specialists instructions more closely because if I dont do my part how can I expect change?

My Mum is an Angel and home is a piece of heaven

I have the warmest room in the house, my Mum put on the electric blanket to warm my bed for me when I was out the other night and I have had the best 2 nights sleep I have had in a long time.
Nothing is too much trouble, too much work, she cooks really nice dinner for me, takes me out to the shops to get food and snacks I can manage to eat, just being home for 2 and a half days and I'm feeling more relaxed.

Exams are over for now and time will tell how I have done. I don't want to think about them really because I dont feel like I have much hope of doing ok. This will be the closest I have ever felt to actual failure and I'm not even sure I want to know my exam results. Its weird, the longer I continued to feel so ill and the less time I had to study, the less I cared about even sitting any exams, I didnt have the energy. I'm just more frustrated than anything that I wasn't able to put the work I wanted and needed to put into exam prep as I should have and because of that its going to be hard not to be disappointed.

I went to see a dr and he was really lovely, didnt make me feel like it was all about feelings (and if you sort out your emotions everything will disappear...). He ran some more bloods and I will get the results sometime this coming week and he wrote a certificate for my exam impairment application. I'm not expecting that the blood tests will reveal anything but its worth ruling things out just the same.
I contacted the physio who works with my pain specialist and she said that he will be able to help me and that she will be able to help me work on the nausea too, saying it is the result of a 'lowered central threshold'. So I'm thinking thats a bit like the hypersensitivity that comes with crps and that now my body is reacting to other types of normal stimuli the wrong way (I'm expecting to be told its a result of stress). I'm just glad to hear that hopefully once I see them I will be able to get over all this and be back to feeling better becuase I really dont like the thought of carrying on like this for much longer. Mornings are the worst by far and one of my practical exams finished a little pear shaped as I did not make it out the door before I fainted causing yet more havoc. I told the associate dean that I'm not comming back for semester 2 if I'm not feeling better, there is no way I can get through class full time and clinical placement feeling the way I have been. Mum suggested trying ginger to see if it helped the nausea and although it doesnt get rid of it completely, drinking ginger beer and sucking these ginger sweets I found is certainly helping me get through the day much easier and I'm finally able to eat a bit more without fear of puking it up again.

I have almost finished packing yet again, tomorrow afternoon I'm off overseas to Australia for an 8 day holiday visiting a friend who is studying med. I'm so excited that we are both on semester break at the same time so that we are able to be together and have some well earned fun. She has been 'plotting' ever since I booked my flights and I just hope that I dont ruin anything because of how I've been feeling. She is not fazed and says we will just see how things go and plan accordingly. Frequent small meals are on the menu and I know she is someone who will understand if I say I need to sit or slow down at any point. She is going to make a really good dr in a few years time.
So, I wont be online very much if at all in the next week as I'm leaving my laptop behind and looking forward to taking things easy with a good friend, forgetting about uni and hopefully feeling a bit better as well. Just a little bit scared as I will be flying on my own and spending the first night on my own in central Sydney before I catch the 8 hour train to where my friend is living but I'm sure I will be fine :)

If wishes were horses, beggars would ride...

How I wish that I could stop feeling sick. Nausea sucks...

nausea+random pain+crps pain+exam stress=too much.

I'm being worn down by having to deal with all this, despite the fact I have actively stopped stressing about exams, I know subconsciously I still am. But I have been through exams with crps before and I didn't make myself physically sick so I'm inclined to think that there is more going on.
Also the nausea started over a month ago, way before even the hint of exam pressure was dawning.

I feel worse once I have eaten, which is making life difficult as you cant just stop eating (or at least I cant afford to).

I have figured out that a piece of toast in the morning (minus the bottom crust) and a glass of juice to take my meds, will stay down. Any more and I have trouble stopping it come back up. Lunch time I can eat a few crackers and an apple or a yoghurt if I'm lucky...
Dinner mostly I'm eating almost 2/3rds of what I had been and feel pretty sick but can keep it down if I stay still.
If I try eating any more than that then watch out my stomach will not like it and it wont stay down.
I'm sipping water throughout the day so I'm keeping hydrated.

Last night I had a piece of chocolate cake a bit after dinner and boy did I regret it afterwards but it did taste nice :)

I'm not sleeping due to the tummy pain and nausea, feeling pretty tired due to the lack of sleep, end of semester and probably lack of food.
Starting to get pretty upset with myself because I'm not able to spend the time I know I should be and need to studying. I have to lay curled up a lot because that's the best position to keep from puking and you cant study like that (not when you feel rotten anyway).

I'm starting to notice subtle signs that I'm losing weight, which is something I am very aware I need to stop because I don't have reserves to loose.
A friend suggested I just become anorexic to solve the problem!!!which is terrible advice, there is no way I can afford to even get myself into that way of thinking.

I have a Dr's appointment tomorrow to get a medical certificate to go with my special consideration application and I really hope that this guy will be able to suggest something to help me feel better.
Because its been suggest this is related to crps I don't really know what to think about it. I cant wait for my pain specialist appointment next month to ask him his opinion, because I guess he is my specialist and will hopefully give me some direction on what could be going on. I don't like the thought this actually could be crps, I don't deal well with nausea and if I cant get it under control there is no way I am going to be able to get through the rest of the year with clinical placements etc. I just don't see it possible...crps is hard enough without adding daily nausea to it.

I'm just so tired of no relief and no end in sight, what could possibly be causing all this to be happening?

An RSD guide to getting through exams

SET REALISTIC GOALS! Before you turned into a chronic pain warrior you may have been able to Ace an exam with your eyes closed, but its different now...SO WHAT!…just being here trying is testimony to your courage and strength (and that C or B is worth so much more than those A’s you used to get, just because of the effort you put into getting them)

Phone a friend to debrief after your exams if you feel that unloading helps your mind calm down.

Don’t run out of any meds (or if you do make sure you have a friend on hand with a stash gathering dust)

Surround yourself with supportive people, find someone you study well with, teaching others what you are learning is a great way to understand something better. But schedule some alone time too.

Take regular breaks…Sometimes taking a break is better than trying to cram more information in, your brain only holds so much, and its probably holding a good amount of pain so that leaves limited space.

Do NOT put yourself down in the middle of an exam because you heard yourself say/do something wrong or silly…so what? Everybody is making those same mistakes and at least you tried!

Its ok to freak out a LITTLE, heck everyone around you is too so its normal, just don’t let it consume you.

Don’t cancel sport/exercise/dance dates to study, having fun releases endorphins, de-stresses and increases blood flow - all more important for your brain than looking at pages of dancing letters for the 1000th time.

Set little rewards between exams, things to look forward to...they are great at helping you stay focused

Now is a good time to practice those meditation and relaxation strategies you know how to use…you could even do with teaching them to a few of your frazzled classmates

Eat PROPERLY, do not skip meals just because you cant waste study time, and drink plenty of WATER

Go to bed and try and get the same number of hours of sleep you would usually get, being extra tired is not going to help your over worked brain function well.

BELIEVE in yourself, you probably know more than you think you do, and stressing about shoulda/coulda’s doesn’t change anything (except waste more precious time)

And be PROUD of your achievements, you dont have it easy so to be standing where you are makes you AMAZING!

Please grant me the strength to get through

because right now everything is so overwhelming that its taking all I've got to keep myself together.

I have not done enough study to get me through the next week of practical, oral and written exams and I do not feel I deserve to pass.

I have studied and practiced but not as much as I wanted to and certainly not as much as I should have. I am still dealing with this horrible tummy pain and nausea that is affecting almost everything. Dear God I need a miracle...

I've been tagged :)

This is a bit of a different questionnaire that Alison tagged me with so I thought I would play the game :)

What is your current obsession?

I wouldn't say that I am obsessed with anything as such...but being in control would have to be my 'obsession' I think.

Starbucks or Peets?

I'm not sure what Peet's is either so I say Starbucks. They are pretty expensive so quite a treat but they do make nice hot/iced chocolates (what I order lol).

What's for dinner?

I've just had my dinner, it was mashed potato and this lamb curry dish thing my Uncle made.

What would you eat for your last meal?

A really nice Italian pasta dish and some salad, and then a to die for chocolate cake (how fitting lol).

What was the last thing you bought?

A packet of perky nana's does the count? But the last thing I bought that wasnt food was return flights to Sydney for a week during my semester break.

What are you listening to right now?

Jon Schmidt (probably sounds weird but I love listening to piano pieces)

What is your favourite flavour ice cream?

A really good real chocolate ice cream

What do you think of the person(s) that tagged you?

She is an amazing young woman and I think that she will achieve some amazing things as she grows up!

If you could go anywhere in the World for the next hour, where would you go?

I would love to go and meet one of my overseas RSD friends, but it would be really hard to choose who to go visit...

Which language do you want to learn?

Sign language, I have been wanting to learn this for absolutely ages but have to wait till after I finish my degree because I dont have the time just now.

What is your favourite quote right now?

"Spread your wings and fly...nothing is impossible!"

What is your favourite piece of clothing in your own wardrobe?

I think is the amazing blue dress hiding in a bag in my wardrobe, its sky blue and has flowers and butterflies on it in beadwork, its such a pretty grown up dress and I am saving it for my graduation dinner to wear it is so special.

What is your dream job?

I want to be a Physiotherapist (Physical therapist) who works in pain management and helps others who are in the same position I have been in. I am getting closer to reaching my goal, a year and a half to go.

What is your worst habit?

I am too scared to speak my mind and instead I just sit quiet and dont say anything. There are many times I would like to just say how I'm feeling but I dont want to create a scene.

If you had £100, what would you spend it on right now?

I would keep it for my holidays that are coming up really soon, I would spend it in Sydney on some nice clothes and things to spoil myself a bit.

Do you admire anyones style?

I always liked Liv Tyler, she seemed to have depth unlike a lot of celebrities around. But I dont really follow the stars. I admire my best friend very much, she has so much confidence and because of that is exploring the world and having so much fun (I wish I was with her so we could do it together)

Describe your style?

I am pretty girly but am really lazy and mostly go around in trackpants and comfy tops and sneakers. I need comfy and sensible clothes because of what I am studying at uni.

What are you going to do after this?

Study!!!! Exams are so so close!

What are your favourite movies?

Well of course there is The Sound of Music :) and I love Finding Neverland too.

What is your favourite fruit?

Summer fruits, too many to name

What inspires you?

The people close to me who battle on showing so much courage, they inspire me to continue fighting on. S a physio at the school I study at, he reminds me why I'm doing this and that nothing can stop me achieving my goal.

Your favourite book?

I love proper childrens classics, L M Alcot (The little woman 4 books), C S Lewis (Narnia chronicles), L M Montgomery (Anne of Green Gables series)...you get the picture, I'm a romantic and have a vivid imagination so these types of stories make full use of it. I dont read much anymore due to my head injury and the rsd effects.

Do you collect something?

Pretty things lol, I have a coin collection and also stamps among other random things like the minature Winnie the Pooh play sets that were around a while back.

What is your favourite smell?

Just after it has rained, the air smells so clean and lovely.

What are you most proud of?

I guess I am proud of what I have got through and the fact I am still in the physio school program. Things have been tough but I am still here doing my best.

What are five beauty products you couldn't live without?

Beauty products are not really my thing but I make sure I wear my bronzing powder when on placement, otherwise I look pretty ill and I dont like being asked whether I'm ok all the time.

Cats or dogs?

Cats

A cosy night in or a night on the town?

A cosy night in :)


I'm not into tagging people so if you want to play along feel free!
here are the rules:
1. respond and rework; answer the question on your blog, replace one question that you dislike with a question of your invention, add more one question of your own.
2. tag eight other people