Its been a long month... and a lot has happened which I probably meant to keep updated on here but I'm sure you will forgive me :) the real world takes up so much time and energy that its hard to find the time to fit in all my cyber wantings.

So what have I been up to? Thats a good question.. and to save you reading a novel I shall bullet point the past 4 weekish.
*Studying for my pathology special exam (this took up several weeks with trying to study and not getting very far)
*Traveling back down to Dunedin in order to sit this special exam (6 hour bus ride)
*Missing the exam
*Sitting the exam (since it was miss-communication between two departments that caused me to miss it in the first place... I was a very stressed girl at one point)
*Traveling back home again (another 6 hour bus ride)
*Finding out I passed the exam (a big PHEW)
*Starting 4th year!!!!
*Surviving the very tough first professional study week (full time schedule)

Which brings me to now... its Friday afternoon and I have made it to the end of the first week with only one hitch (that included being kept late over lunch time for a lecture that was running late which stuffed my tummy up and caused me to miss the last lecture and be rather sick the rest of the day).

A few other things have happened... I've finally got the beginnings of a new GP who I'm hoping is going to investigate the nausea/vomiting issue in more detail and see if there is something we can do to at least make me feel more comfortable. I've been trialling Zofran which has been great... only down side is for the moment I can only get a total of 6 tablets a month rather than the 60 that would be useful.
Due to increasingly worse nausea and vomiting issues I have cut down on my regular medications (as I cant physically keep them down when I try and take them) and so far I think I am coping relatively well on the pain front.
My physio thinks I am doing pretty darn well as far as coping too but is not ready to wave goodbye any time soon... she wants to keep a close eye and is available at any time should I need some advice.
I've turned a corner with the non eating issue, now I'm really making an effort to eat despite how I'm feeling whereas before I wasn't really forcing myself... the dietitian is much happier I think because of this, just waiting to see if I actually start to gain any weight. Its been pretty tough this last month and I'm not sure despite my trying hard I will have made any headway.

As far as crps is concerned... I am hoping that it doesnt show its ugly face too much this year. I had a long talk with the clinical coordinator in my centre and she is very down to earth and not going to make me feel like I need to prove myself like I felt other years. She said that time off if I'm sick and need to go home is a non issue unless it becomes like every week (something I am not anticipating). She is just going to treat me like everyone else YAY!!! The only thing she has concerns about is my history of falling... and yes she is allowed to be concerned I suppose. I mean you cant have a balance challenged physio walking a balance challenged patient and even I can see that... I'm just hoping that my recent history (ie no major falls since August when I broke my wrist) is a positive step and a continuing trend. Lets just see how things go but right now I think MY major concern is the extreme fatigue I am feeling due to just being out learning all day...something I need to adjust to and then we'll be away laughing-heres hoping anyway!

So thats where I've been... and where I'm at... the beginning of a scary, rewarding final year (all going well) before I am let loose on the world!
"Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than your current situation." Brian Tracy

Could this be put better? Or come at a better time... a time when people often reflect on the passing of the old year and make resolutions for the new.

I'm not that keen on making New Year resolutions anymore, experience has taught me something... every day should have some kind of affirmation, some goal to work towards, something to strive for... and I find that one simple goal is more achievable than high hopes that are dashed within a week or lost in among the life changing events that so often occur when you least expect.

For me laying here right now, I simply say:

"Thank you God for giving me the strength, the support, the hope, the love, the friendship and the determination to get through the past year... and please continue to give me all these things to help me make it through the next. I place my trust in you, I will never give up hope and I will be faithful to you... when I falter please give me the grace to stand up and continue on my journey knowing you are always there."

But in saying that, I also hope that 2010 will be full of great things for so many... for my friends, for my family, and you all here who read my inconsistent rambles... you all share in a part of my journey, have touched me in some way and for this I say thank you.

Go forth and let this year be a year of miracles, hope, achievement... and as always-gratitude reminding ourselves that progress is progress no matter how small or insignificant it may seem.

So HAPPY NEW YEAR, MAY 2010 BE A HAPPY YEAR, A HEALTHY YEAR, a year full of joy and hope, a year full of accomplishments and may we all fulful God's promises for us and take on the challanges He has in store for us with faith and courage.

Happy new year! Happy 2010, a new decade to strive for good health and personal growth...