The world wasn't instant brightness the next morning but it is slowly showing me that it hasn't forgotten the recipe so I know that it is there somewhere.
Just a quick one to keep you updated, I had my meeting with the Associate Dean (who is lovely by the way). She is keeping everything confidential for now, deciding that if we tell everyone then it will bias my grading. Instead, she is trusting me to know when I feel unwell and then I am to inform my clinical educator on that day as patient safety (and my own) is paramount.

I really appreciate the fact that she feels she can trust me to make that judgment and this way I can show my capabilities naturally and then hopefully pass the competencies in a truthful way. I still need to show that I am capable, something that would be hard if I was having to 'prove' myself while not being 'allowed' near certain patients because of somehow being 'unsafe'...something that got in my way last year and created some complicated situations.

I would never put anyone else in danger so I know that she is right in trusting me, its just nice that she feels she can! And I also like the fact that she is wanting to keep in touch so we are going to meet up again in a couple of weeks just to see how everything is going. I feel like this shows that she really does want to offer me support and is not just saying it. I have also been given the name of someone else I can talk to about any aspect of the course (in confidence) should I wish to do so.

I am quite relieved as now I know the right person knows about me and also feel better knowing there are ways and means to get through even if it means taking a slightly longer route that normal.

Next on my list is to go and see my student advisor at Disability Information and Support (who I have been seeing for the last 2 years on and off) to get my paper work in (proving I am elegible for extra assistance) and organise access to the special quiet room in the library and my digital recorder and also anything else that I may find useful this year that she may suggest :)

I go and see a new dr, early next week too (my friend who also has CRPS has been seeing her for a couple of years) Lovely Jo is going to introduce me so that will be helpful and I think it will be nice having a dr who knows and understands how CRPS can affect a person on so many levels.

But there are still somethings going on that are a bit stressful. There are aspects of my life that have got more complicated, all I can say is it seems to be turning into a series of unfortunate events, but overall I feel much calmer-more in control.

And if a bit more in control is how I feel then that is nothing to be sneezed at, a few days ago I was drowning but now I am treading water-a much better place to be even if I still have to learn to swim to the shore.


SailLttleboat07 said...

I again love reading about others and how they are persevering in getting through the pain of RSD and it inspires me everyday to keep on chugging... I am not sure if anybody would be interested in following me through my journey via my new blog... but if you are here is the link...
I would love to know someone is reading my blog as well...
Thanks again for all the inspiration and keeping me going...

Dave Schultz said...

Happy birthday, sweet Felicia.

jeisea said...

Hi again and happy birthday.

This isn't quite the the right post to reply to your comment on my blog. Hope you don't mind.

I'm so glad you've had some success with mirror therapy. I've found the same as you that you need to keep doing it for problems that continue. I also found that as I settled one pain another came immediately after in a different place. I have a whole body problem so this wasn't spread. However over time things began to settle a little. First I had very short break between flare ups, only a few days. Next the breaks were a bit longer. Gradually I was able to overall lower pain and felt I was gaining some control. This took time.

The next thing I want to share is that I think there are a number of ways to retrain the brain. The dancing you are doing now is one, specially as you will be encouraged to do it correctly. Normal, correct movement retrains the brain in the right way to move. This is why physical therapy is so important. Each thing you add in eg music, breeze from a fan, chewing something, perfume or oils, will enhance the experience and retrain the brain with a fresh experience. So vary what you do. This is the case, I believe with mirror therapy. Add in extras. Eat high anti oxidant foods. If you have an injury then remember 1000mg of vitamin C will deal with inflammation and help prevent CRPS complications fro the injury.

About the tears. This condition is enormously stressfull. We cope well without extra stress but it doesn't take much to tip us over the edge. Stress can be good things happening too. One effective way to calm down overall is by taking time each day to sit upright in a chair, breathe normally and then breathe out long breaths (I do twice as long out as in. My doctor says for me todo this several times a day for 5-6mins. German research says if you do it for 15mins three time a week it will overall reduce high blood pressure. In essence, what it does is activate the parasympathetic nervous system and brings about calm. If you can get into the habit of doing this it will help you by retraining the brain that all is well, by lowering pain (stress ramps up pain) and by helping you calm.
Let me know if this helps you.

Lisa Moon said...

I'm so happy to hear (more) of the meeting with the Assoc. Dean! She sounds very helpful and I'm pleased that she's asked you to return to see her.

I think sometimes that life is a series of unfortunate events, interspersed with moments of joy and events filled with happiness.

Trying to focus on those joy and happiness types! :)