I seem to remember that bush fires 'jump' from one side of a road to the other and carry on destroying everything in their path...I think I am discovering that crps is just like that (jumps from one limb to the other).
Lets just say I think I am experiencing a mirror type spread. My once fondly called good Left foot seems to have decided it felt left out and is joining in on the game of crps.
Burning hot pain, allodynia, exact mirroring of the red patches on my feet, and up both legs the bright red stops at exactly the same height, I swear its just like looking in a mirror-even my Mum was impressed (and then asked me whether this was good or bad...). I've also been experiencing my share of pain related nausea, so much so that I have not been able to control it (puking is ghastly, I hate the whole feeling especially when you don't feel relief after).
I say that I'm not happy about this but in reality I'm emotionless, I think I automatically shut off all feeling before I had a chance to think-protection mechanism perhaps?
Anyway, there is no point in being angry or upset or stress about it-that doesn't achieve anything.
It might just be some kind of flare...I might have unsettled things in my latest fall, maybe its because of all the stress I've been subject to recently...I could make up reasons till the cows come home-and that's what I plan on doing for now. Its really too early to say (I'm telling myself, well its only been a couple of weeks or so, not long enough to have any idea). I'm sure things will settle down soon and Lefty will decide it doesn't like copying Righty after all and go back to being normal...I'm sure that's the case...
...but lets just say, umm, well I don't quite like it and am trying very hard not to think about the possibilities.
But just now I am pretty gutted that I can't see either my pain specialist or my crps physio, neither of them are seeing patients my ONE week back home for uni break.
5 comments:
Ohhh, *curses*! Dratted doctors - why can't they be available when you REALLY need them?!
I'm hoping and praying for you that this mirror reaction is just that - a reaction... and that it calms down and rights itself promptly!
I know it's SO hard, but try to keep as calm as you can - rational about it, you know? I have found myself in that terribly frightened place and it makes it all worse. And I know, that's so easy to say and so hard to do!
Remember your mirror therapy, rest as much as possible, and practise meditation and mindfulness. Not sure how? You'll surely find a TON on the 'Net - look for Jon Kabat-Zinn, who has done wonderful stuff for people with chronic pain. I hope it's helpful for you as it has been for me.
Much love and support,
Lisa
PS Remember, I'm here ANYtime you need me for a rant, a shoulder or whatever. :)
I am SO sorry to hear about this mirror spread...so strange that it should mirror your original side exactly, but then this is a STRANGE condition we suffer. Hugs for you...I know whenever my CRPS worsens I go through a couple of weeks of grieving and adjustment and a little thinking I'm crazy for believing what's really happening...all that stuff. Feel free to rant at me if you ever need to xoxox
Well Butterfly,
I knew my legs were doing the mirror thing, but then I have a totally screwed up body but perfect replica's....
Thats cool and messed up at the same time...
You know what I mean!!!!
I'm wondering of it's the change in season...
My legs are not playing well together at the moment...
In fact I had to email one certain amazingly mad pain specialist to get the dreaded pain killers sent to the pharmacy...
But I vow I will only take them when I'm totally at wits end because Gustov is makiing life very difficult at the moment and I'm not going to give him any excuse to behave worse!!!
Missing you.
See you Friday???
Love you
Jo
Oh, love. I know this feeling so well, and it sure is a scary one. I can't believe some professionals don't believe it spreads!!!!! I refuse to ever call it CRPS for that reason... it's not regional at all. If it were, I would only have it in my right foot instead of both legs and arms.
Keep that chin up and keep us updated.
Thinking of you!
Butterfly?
Have I told you lately how totally awesome you are???
Hope we didn't exhaust you too much...
I'm off for a shower and bed!!
That drive was mammoth!
A. gave us a "warm cherry greeting" when we got home (Yeah, Right)
IT has to be done!!!
A. is out all day tomorrow so tuesday IT shall have to be!!!
Take it easy on yourself,
Hope you sleep better tonight *giggle*
Love you
Later
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